Oh, the inhumanity

Ever wonder if you have an alien living in the neighborhood?

Well, now there is a fool-proof test to see if your suspicions are correct.

It's easy, really. Just take a lie detector machine, hook up your 'alleged' alien, and ask one simple question.

"Did you feel any happiness upon hearing of Osama Bin Laden's death?"

If your subject answers 'no' and your lie-detector doesn't react, congratulations! You have an extraterrestrial being in your presence.

There was a quote going around the internet yesterday that said something along the lines of "love is awesome, don't be a hater on a dead guy." The quote was attributed to Martin Luther King. So naturally, people took it seriously.

Turns out the quote was a fraud. Also turns out it was full of shit either way.

Even if MLK did say it, that wouldn't invalidate the feelings you had when you heard the news of Osama's death. People say stupid shit all the time. King may not have done it as often, but he certainly wasn't immune.

Fact is, love doesn't conquer all. It would be nice if life were so simple, but it's not. Love is great. Hate sucks, sure. But the complex problems the universe throws our way are usually solved by hard work, creative thinking and and an obsessive focus on the task at hand.

And that's what happened with Bin Laden. Nearly 10 years after his horrific crimes, he was taken out in a mission that was bold, brave and executed to near-perfection.

So when the news came out, you felt happy. Happy for achieving some sense of finality. Happy for getting some level of retribution.

This man murdered nearly 3,000 people. To feel no measure of happiness at his death is to remove yourself from the human experience. Life is not an intellectual exercise. We have emotions for a reason. They help us deal with that which our 'mind' cannot. It's tough to wrap your head around the idea of killing anyone, let alone thousands. But it's pretty easy to feel anger when it happens.

And it's just as easy to fell happiness when justice is done. Unless you're an alien.