Saturday, July 9, 2011

No jobs for us, no job for you

While congress and the president have tea, deciding whether or not they want to drive our economy off a cliff or stick it with a knife a thousand times, there are roughly 300 million of us actual people who stand to be fucked either way.

The only people who won't be fucked? The politicians. Because even if the economy completely crashes, most of them are assured of a job for as long as they want it.

But wait, won't they get voted out of office if they screw up?

Not likely. Incumbents in congress tend to get reelected no matter what happens. And George W. Bush proved in 2004 that no matter how badly you fuck up your fist term, there's a good chance we'll invite you back to screw things up some more.

So perhaps we need to give the guys in office a little extra incentive to actually do their jobs.

I say, if the unemployment rate is above 8% at any election cycle, every single federal politician gets the fuck out. That's right. Every last one of you. Take a time out, stand in the corner for a couple of years and think about what you didn't do.

Listen, 8% isn't that tough. We've spent most of history well under that number. But when we get above that number? Shit tends to suck really hard. And as far as I'm concerned, it means whatever we're doing isn't working. So bring on some new blood.

I'll tell you one thing, you'd see Boehner and Obama spending a lot more time together, trying to figure out our real problems if they knew their asses were really on the line. You'd see people's true colors come through as well. Instead of throwing out theories about what may or may not create jobs, people would go with what they truly believe will work. And they'd be much more aggressive about it too.

Now, I don't even want to wait until something like this could become a formal law. Let's ask every federal politician to sign a pledge. And unlike the bigoted, homophobic nonsense pledge that Michele Bachmann just signed, let's keep this one simple and straightforward.

"If the United States unemployment rate is not below 8% by Election Day 2012, I will step down from office."

You think any one of these fuckers would have the guts to sign it?

No comments:

Post a Comment