Some other shit happened. A lot of it actually. So I thought I'd fill everyone in.
In the past week, while most of the country was fixated on a congressman's schlong, the following, clearly less important things also took place.
About 900 Americans died because they didn't have health insurance.
A few hundred people died in Syria, as unrest in the middle east continued to rage on.
The people of the world continued to make the planet hotter and less hospitable.
Wildfires raged in Arizona, threatening residential neighborhoods and inching perilously close to a multistate electrical grid.
We escalated our bombing campaign in Libya.
We intensified drone air strikes against Yemen.
Another 427,000 people filed for unemployment.
We got another week closer to defaulting on our debt and hurling the country into another catastrophic recession.
The nuclear reactor in Fukushima, Japan continued to leak radiation, with no clear end in sight.
Unless Weiner has some sort of magical member that can make all of these problems go away, it's time for everyone, including our pathetic media, to pull their collective eyeballs off of that cock and start focusing on shit that really matters.